CONFIDENCE:A great deal of success and power with women has nothing to do with how you act and feel about them, but a lot to do with how you act and feel about yourself. What we’re really talking about here is SELF-RESPECT.
Plenty of men who wouldn’t take a bit of crap from another guy turn into down right spineless wimps when it comes to women. Whether they are reliving old dramas with a mommy they couldn’t please as children, or are scared for some other reason, they put the woman first.
Other guys have a slightly different problem. They may not take any crap from a woman, but getting laid is SO damn important to them that they lose sight of other priorities. In a sense in loses all the fun aspects, and gets to be a compulsion.
Guys like this may win the battles, but they are definitely losing the war. Women may be nice additions to your life, and if you find the right one, you might even chose to make her part of the center of yours. But a life spent doing nothing but chasing women is a pretty stupid one.
If that is your problem, then pull yourself up short for a minute, and ask yourself if you might be missing some of the other pleasures life has to offer. You might be shocked to learn that a quiet evening at home with a good book can actually be more stimulating than a boring date with a huge breasted bimbo with a room temperature I.Q.
So here’s a hint for increasing your confidence with women: STOP NEEDING THEM SO MUCH! And a good way to do that is going out and finding a hobby that you can really enjoy. Something that gets you AWAY from women.
Not only will this increase your confidence as you are on the prowl, it provides a great escape for when that special lady you are with puts a bit of stress and strain on your brain, as they so often will.
Here is a magic word that will bring you loads of success with women, and get you laid like crazy. It works with all women, but the more beautiful the woman, the better it works. The word is: NO!
That’s right. No! The same word that will keep a puppy from wetting the carpet will also keep a woman from shitting on you!
You must say no to a woman once in a while, when it is over an issue of importance, and when you mean it.
No matter how gorgeous, or great in the sack or how otherwise wonderful she may be (and who else but such a goddess could possibly begin to deserve to be in YOUR company?) you must be willing to walk away from her if you can’t deal with her from a position of self-respect.
And self-respect, my friend, is mostly a matter of what you say no to. It’s a boundary set by what is not permitted, tolerated or allowed. And while it may be negative from this semantic sense, in reality it is the most power and positive force you have going for you. When a woman senses it in you, she knows she’s found something she’s instinctively wanted since she realized she’s female: A MAN SHE COULD NEVER HOPE TO CONTROL.
I know this isn’t easy. It hurts, really hurts to have to walk away from someone you really dig because she isn’t treating you right. But love can often be like a street fight, and remember the street fighter’s number one rule: Ignore the pain and carry out your offensive with everything you’ve got. If you can pull this off, you will walk with a confidence and power that women of all ages will be able to sense. And more importantly, you’ll like the guy who lives inside your skin.
STILL MORE CONFIDENCE
George S. Patton Jr., the hell-for-leather General of World War II fame was once asked what he thought of his rival, the British Field Marshall Montgomery. Patton replied, “He’s the best General the British have. But he’s more interested in not losing than he is in winning. Unfortunately for many men, that’s their attitude toward women. They walk on egg-shells, cautious as can be, hoping against hope that they don’t make a mistake.
If you want to have DYNAMIC power with women, begin to focus on what you want, and what you are going to do, not on what you might lose or what’s going to happen to you if you don’t win. Of course, give the risks a glance. But don’t focus on them.
Focus on what you desire. What will it be like when you’re with that woman you want? What will you see? What will you hear? What will you feel in your body?
In short:GLANCE AT WHAT YOU MIGHT HAVE TO LOSE, BUT FOCUS ON WHAT YOU WANT TO WIN
How to fake confidence with women?
When I was in college, and struggling just to get a date, let alone get laid right and left, I knew one guy who ALWAYS had great looking women around him. He seemed to know practically every girl on campus, and they’d always come up to him and give him hugs and kisses. No, he was not a coke dealer or a pimp. Of all things, he was an evangelist.
I’d watch him go to work on women who were absolute strangers and within a few minutes, they’d be laughing and punching him playfully, sometimes giving him hugs.
And what was his secret, a secret I hope YOU use to launch you on the way to getting laid like a bandit? His affinity and warmth made women feel ADORED. He didn’t come on all hot and heavy, like a hungry wolf on the prowl. He came on with all the friendliness and fun at his disposal – as if these strange women were long lost friends that he dearly loved.
And they bought it! Even the chickiest woman, who is very uptight about being a sex object, wants to feel loved and special. And just by the warmth in the tone of his voice and his smile he made these girls feel as if they WERE long lost friends.
Look at it this way: Even the nastiest person finds it hard to react fearfully or angrily to someone who makes them feel loved and appreciated.
I suggest you make this AS IF principle part of your bag of tricks. The next time you approach a woman who is making you burst out of your pants with lust, try putting aside the lust and turning on the warmth.
Conveying warmth and affinity isn’t so tough – just think of how you look and sound when you see a niece or nephew, or even a pet that delights you. No, I am not suggesting baby talk as a way of scoring babes. I’m trying to give you an example of where it’s natural for you to behave the way I’d like you to try behaving with women.
The important principle to apply here is that THE MEANING OF YOUR COMMUNICATION IS THE RESPONSE IT GETS. If you use a tone of voice or a facial expression that makes women fearful or suspicious, then no matter how clever your words are, the message you convey to her is that she should be afraid and suspicious of you.
If voice tone and physiology (and again I don’t mean your appearance per se, but rather your posture and facial expressions) are so crucial in how women react to you, then what is the key to producing voice tone and physiology? Your belief and expectation about your outcome.
If you believe you are going to get rejected then you are either going to convey fear, and make her fearful or else you are going to try to beat her to the punch and act so obnoxious that she rejects you right off, so you don’t have to wait too long in suspense for your negative prediction to come true. You just want to get it over with quickly so you actually produce the humiliation that you believe you cannot avoid.
By contrast, if you act as if you truly were someone who everyone liked and received warmly, then that warmth is what your tone and physiology will convey, and that’s the response you will get, nine times out of ten. I’m not saying you’ll get laid with everyone you approach, but seldom will you have a nasty experience either. And any woman who doesn’t respond positively to warmth and affinity is seriously sick and should be avoided at all costs anyway.
PRACTICE EXERCISE: OK, I know this one is going to SEEM a little silly, but it’s going to help you get laid like CRAZY, so just do it!
Remember the words to the pledge of allegiance. In case you don’t here they are: (You may stand and put your hand over your heart if you so choose.)
I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America, and to the Republic for which it stands, one nation, under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.
Practice, out loud, saying these words with all the warmth and friendliness you can muster.
Practice saying them out loud as if you thought they were the funniest thing in the world and you might crack up laughing at any moment.
Just remember –